Always Forward, Rarely Straight

25 09 2012

So I was living the dream, 70 pounds down, plant based diet, feeling healthier and full if energy – then vacation time came. After making the proclamation here that I would not allow vacation to derail me as it has done to so many others – it did. Day one of vacation started with pancakes, bacon and sausage and I never looked back. And a week spiraled into two months of eating a lot more of what I hadn’t been. The last time I looked at a scale I had gained back 12 pounds.

How does it happen? How do human beings that are so focused on a goal slip up like that and completely fall apart? For me, I was frustrated. I was tired of feeling like I was depriving myself and barely seeing the needle on the scale move. It was frustrating to go to my acupuncture appointments and pay hundreds of dollars and see that I lost .4 pounds that week when I knew how hard I was working to lose more. Some weeks, I was even slightly up. So despite the tremendous physical benefits I was feeling from acupuncture, I stopped going all together.

And same was the fate of this blog…checking in weekly to give the weight loss report – I’m just not wired that way. The self imposed “foot on the neck” approach does not yield lasting results for me. I need to have a more gentler setup.

In the past several weeks, I’ve felt a whole lot less full of vigor. I started to feel like how I felt a year ago right before I got sick. I’ve recently been eating an 80% raw diet of uncooked fruits,veggies and nuts in an effort to get back on track. I’ll be frank, I have no idea of what the future game plan is here. I’m just trying to figure out what works for me. Mostly plant based / mostly raw feels good but I’m just not sure if I have the strength or will to limit all food intake to that – at least for the moment.

I’m thankful to the many people who wrote me to see if all was okay or to ask what happened to the blog. It would have been interesting to blog during this two months “in the wilderness” but I just didn’t have it in me. I needed to hit the reset button and clear my mind. I feel like I’m in a better space now.

So for those still checking in, thanks so much. Here we go again…always forward, rarely straight….





And the Train Kept Rolling….

20 02 2012

And so begins week 9 of my switch to a plant based diet.  I lost a pound this past week.   That brings the total to over 46 pounds lost through diet, exercise and sickness.

I wasn’t thrilled with the weight loss this week.  I pushed myself to try to lose 5 pounds so that I could hit an even 50 pounds within 8 weeks and I ended up falling short.  I gave it a good effort but it just didn’t happen.  Maybe this is my ego needing big round numbers.  I should be content with just continuing to lose the weight.  In my mind I think it makes a good story to lose 50 pounds so quick. But the real story is this – losing weight is hard and its really  #$&*!@ frustrating at times.  You think you’ve found your personal formula for success and then weight loss slows down dramatically or stops all together.  I didn’t even want to write this blog today because I was so aggravated.

I knew that five pounds in a week was not going to be easy but I felt that with some discipline it could be done.  I came up with what I thought was a good game plan.  I tried to switch the week up by cutting back the amount of plant based fats I was taking in but honestly it just left me hungry.  I increased my fiber and protein intake but still hungry…  Miserably hungry for the last four days and the scale barely moved when all was said and done.    So I need to work harder, especially physically, if I’m going to be able to sustain the kind of weight loss that I’ve been seeing up until this point.  I really hope my dumbbells I ordered get here soon as I’m eager to throw them around and  I’m starting to hate the treadmill with a passion.  It really is becoming “the dreadmill”.  At least nice weather temps are around the corner which hopefully means a few days walking around the park which will be a pleasant change of scenery.

So after days of feeling overly hungry,  tonight I did  something counterintuitive.  I went to the local buffet.  It’s been two months since I was there and I definitely can’t put it away like I used to nor did I even want to try.  I did enjoy a nice vegetable stirfry and some sushi.  I also had some shrimp.  I feel like my body has been craving meat so I allowed myself a little bit of seafood.  There is definitely some sort of meal with beef in my future.  I thought about tying it a 50 pound weight loss as a reward.  But that sort of thinking got me into this predicament.  Food shouldn’t be a reward, at least not for me, not now.

So yeah, dreaming of beef, even if it is just a piece or two.  For now, I’m just going to increase the B12.  What I did find interesting is that things I would normally get there, like coconut chicken, just weren’t appealing to me in the least.  And if I’m going to eat beef, it’s going to be some place good and not at a buffet.

I’ve got the broccoli rabe soup in the slow cooker.  It’s been going all day and it smells sooooo good.  Pics tomorrow.

Thanks for reading!








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